AD2013:......ENLARGEMENT (3)


……….I was born crippled, weak, misshapen and as ugly as sin on planet Niquitous. My progenitors were the fore-runners of a group of scientists groomed by The Elyon to dominate the planet ( the planet was part of Elyon’s Haven  then) through their discoveries and creativity. While experimenting with a fruity radioactive material they were specially warned not to touch, their bloodlines got corrupted with “transgressoma”, a deadly cancer, hence my nature. Instead of my pro-creators being remorseful for thwarting Elyon’s orders, they laid the blame at His feet for putting the radioactive material within their reach in the first place. They declared civil war and seceded and that was how Niquitous came about.

Niquitous was about the ugliest planet in the universe, but we Niquitousians loved it. It was filled with gigantic black pigs and mud ponds. We got such orgasmic joy from cavorting in the mud that we could never dream of leaving or turning our back on our beloved world. To us nothing in Haven compared to the joys of reveling we experienced there. The orgiastic parties we had made Haven the most boring place in the universe and we had none of its prudish, anal laws. Furthermore Haven’s streets made us claustrophobic, they were absolutely too narrow! Ours were incredibly wide.

Despite our secession, The Elyon still sent His emissaries for peace talks and when that was to no avail, He came Himself and it was on one of those visits that he cut off a part of his heart and presented to our king. This was to show He was ready to allow harmony reign at all costs. I had never seen so much blood, so much love, and so much commitment and could not turn my back on such an extravagant display even though my fellow citizens trampled on the gesture and spat on it. I sneaked off and followed Him to Planet Haven to be adopted as a son.

Then I was taken to Nicodemus lab where I was given a bloodbath and reconstituted by being Injected with the DNA materials of The Elyon through a baptismal infusion with His serum. Fed with pure milk from the many breasted dairies of Shaddai, I became “Rock Christos” a Super Soldier who joined the platoon of the DCC Light Forces. Parakletos was involved in the whole new birth process and two things he always drummed into my ears during the initiation were “Whatsoever is born of Elyon is greater and overcomes the cosmos”….

…… the world had gone black. I came to with life with the flash back of my life’s trajectory, those words ringing in my ears like a million bells. Gently easing out of my wrecked ship, I tried to orientate myself with my surroundings. Weak and groggy, having lost a lot of blood, the “fallen ones” converged on me like hyenas on a wounded lion.

Thankfully my wireless was still intact and I sent an SOS to the “Throne” (seat of Haven’s security headquarters). “Agent Rock supplicating, I need Elyon’s hand”. This hand was an intangible transcendental body suit that released from the Throne gives superhuman strength (this was what enabled Elijah out-run the chariot of Ahab effortlessly). It was released upon me before I even saw the drone eagle that delivered it.

Donning it, I became a living weapon, a battle axe that ran through enemy troops, teeth gritted, eyes in slits, nothing was going to stand before my destiny, and nothing was going to stop the enlargement protocol, not these suckers!

Clips shown of Eleazer, the son of Dodo during my training in the war room, where his hand stuck to his sword when he had to fight a garrison of Philistines, popped in my mind and my Glocks became living extensions of me. I shot, sprayed, spurted, belched and lobbed (the “ark” grenades) death from my hands. Their heads fragmented like spoilt water melons and rotten tomatoes. I was a fox that had been released into a coop of chickens; they fled before me except their most stout hearted who paid dearly for their bravery. I was quick on the draw, it’s either that or death. In the wilderness of Judea that was how the firstborn amongst our brethren was able to defeat the prince of the fallen ones.


“Agent Rock, it does not have to come to this, we can settle our differences amicably”. There she was again, still looking so irresistible. Her voice distracted me once again. This woman had my number and once more my guard came down and in a shot, I saw stars, and they were not those lining the Milky Way. I know an Agent of Light is allowed to fall seven times and rise again but two times in quick succession is ridiculous!

…I woke to the drip of water in a dank, dark dungeon with my hands tied behind my back. I saw the silhouettes of four of the fallen ones. In my mind, I named them Shortee, Blues, Doubtfire and Lusty, my nemesis. These were the worst of the officers of hell.


The fallen ones are wily ones; if they can make you change your confession then they have one up on you. They started working on me slowly, asking me what I want, promising to spare me if I can give up the key since they could not find it where it was hidden. However, I stuck to my confession like a limpet to a rock.

Shortee was the meanest of them all, a well known terrorist, he is short and squat with deep scars running down his face like he had battled a couple of wounded leopards. He had body odour and a breath like the smell from the pits of “abaddon”. Boy, the dude was ugly! His job was to bomb gold reserves, storage silos and cripple economies of the Light forces. He hated Zion with a passion and lived to make sure our prosperity was always endangered. “ Whatever your name is, give me the key and tell me you want death and I will dispatch you fast, if not I will make you feel so much pain that you would think the universe is only made up of agony” he said, releasing rank, fetid fumes into my nostrils.

I looked at him and shouted, “Enlargement”. I was going to keep up this confession and never give up the key or die in the process. That made the guy so mad that he struck me on the face over and over with the butt of his gun. However, that did not make me waver, I remembered the first scroll of the key said to sing and I started belting out albeit hoarsely “……no limits, no boundaries, I can see increase all around me….”. That got them so riled they descended on me like locusts on a fruitful orchard but I kept singing even when my whole body was a mass of hurts and my whole voice was gone. I just kept singing! To stop singing was to die!

Blues was a mean bugger, a pharmacological expert who dealt with chemicals that affected ones spirit and made you depressed. He injected some of his stuff into me, figuring if my spirit became low, I would give up more easily. However, I remembered when we were building the walls of Salem and were making no progress to the point that we all got discouraged, Capt. Nehemiah our platoon leader had told us that “the joy of Elyon was our strength”. Though shivering with all that stuff in my system,voiceless,  I kept screaming “ENLARGEMENT”.

Doubtfire was the dude we are most wary off, sleek and as slippery as a greased eel, his job was to steal and poison faith supplies. The Light forces lived by faith, special bread that was made from floury words from the kitchens of Elyon. So long we have our rations, we can survive anywhere but exhaust them, and survival becomes very remote even in the most conducive environment. I had stuffed myself with enough supplies in the word worlds, so Doubtfire could not affect me in any way. I kept shouting “enlargement” even when they whacked me in the mouth over and over again until it was only bubbles of blood and saliva that came out when I said the word.

Lusty sashayed towards me all radiant and brilliant (her beauty incongruous in such ugly surroundings), lifted my jaw with a finger softer than velvet and surrounded my space with her breath and fragrances that seem to waft from Eden’s best blooms. It was such a welcome relief from the terrible odour Shortee had inundated me with. In that sweet voice of hers, she asked, “are you sure you are not mistaken Rocky darling, would you not rather have entanglement instead of enlargement” and winked at me. I spat out enlargement and stained her pristine white suit that looked whiter than pure driven snow. She was enraged and slapped me viciously. “We will see about your obstinacy” she said.

I was in a tight spot and needed help desperately so with my thumb I depressed a button on my belt that triggered off “Chesed” alarm bells in the “Throne”. I passed out and came to and passed out again! The pain these guys meted out was excruciating, went beyond the limits of the solar system.

Suddenly there was an explosion accompanied by blinding light and the Light Forces prime agent “Jesse Christos”, appeared, right on time. He had a reputation of NEVER BEING LATE TO THE RESCUE!

While the fallen ones were stunned, he freed me and both of us in synchronized unison unleashed our wrath on the enemy. He took out three of them; I have never seen faster shooting all my life even though I was one of the best. If not for the prevailing circumstances, I would have stood and gaped unendingly. I tripped and while looking out for me, Lusty shot Him with one of their hellish submachine guns. He fell and I took the Glock from his hand and pumped a bullet into her forehead. As she died, I realized she was an illusion. She changed to her real form, wizened and old with hair full of writhing serpents. I kept shooting until all their hissing was no more.

The bullets riddled Agent Jesse on the head, hands, feet and side and blood gushed out like an eternal fountain. I was dying because I had lost a lot too and the faithose in my blood was almost gone. He brought out an intravenous set and infused me with the last of His blood, also gave me the last bit of loaf from His ration. I had never witnessed such life giving communion; He gave up His life for me, infused me with his blood. On the battle fields of life, there is no greater love than this, that a man would lay down his life for a friend. As He died, he told me, “remember the words of Elyon, Agent, on this rock, I will build my forces and the gates of hell would not prevail against it”! I wept, broken, amazed, and stunned beyond belief!


I was on my way to Paradisia for vacation in my new cruiser “Rehoboth” (the newest in the enlargement series). As I sipped on chilled Chapman and looked into the eyes of Lillypie my wife and frolicked with Neil and Zoe my children, Joy and peace suffused me. The key of revelation actually opened the doors of enlargement, expansion into galaxies never imagined and what an experience it has been. It unlocked a chain reaction of miraculous possibilities, AD2013 what a year!

What’s more, after three days in Raphas intensive care unit, Agent Jesse rose from the dead (apparently he was only unconscious when I thought he was dead) and is back to His station on the Throne.

As I closed my eyes to nap, the words that came to mind are “……..HE THAT ENDURETH TO THE END SHALL BE SAVED”!!!!!


© 2013 Ekpo Ezechinyere



10 thoughts on “AD2013:……ENLARGEMENT (3)

  1. FANTASTIC PIECE!!!!!!!!! PLEASE PUBLISH! I WANT THIS. Reading it the year through will be of immense help. Beautiful adaptation. I love everything about it.


  2. Excellently delivered, I am so happy it ended well. I had a hunch Lusty was only a gorgon in damsel’ s skin, so her beauty was only skin-deep (looks can be deceptive!). It was a good thing you didn’t lock eyes with her, or you would have turned into a rocky mass more petrous than your name. However, I trust that even if she had been the Lernaean Hydra, with 2:1 head sprout per decapitation, poisonous breath, deadly blood and all, Agent Christos would have delivered you from the many afflictions of the righteous. As you cruise on the Rehoboth with your beloved, I can only imagine that your levels of lovose would continue to rise to bliss (which is the expectation, so please discard all serum sugar monitoring devices), but you still need regular infusions of faithose as well as hopose, to continue to press on toward the mark for the prize of the high calling. I encourage you to remain focused and to never look back on this quest… always remember how Lot’ s wife was turned into a pillar of Sodium Gomorride. Godspeed!
    I hope there’ ll be a ‘series 2’.


  3. You should see how I was grinning from ear to ear like an idiot as I read through this.
    My God DrSwag…
    I have nothing to say to you.
    Because I’m sure you already know what I will say.
    You are the BEST!

    Liked by 1 person

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